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08/28/2020 By Liz Belilovskaya 7 Comments

How to Master the Elusive Art of Goal Setting

How to master the elusive art of goal setting

The art of goal setting is one of the most difficult skills for a lot of people to master. Unsurprisingly, simply setting goals is not the real problem, but finding the discipline and commitment to achieve them is; somehow, obstacles always seem to arise when trying to stay on track. And, once the goals are set, it can become increasingly difficult to cultivate the necessary patience and piece of mind to attain them.

The inability to do so can leave people feeling like failures since they judge themselves for their inability to make their goal a reality. This can create a negative loop, where the failure to achieve something prevents the individual from trying again due to their fear of repeating it, which only deepens the disappointment. But, practice is the only thing that can get us closer to perfection, so in order to master the art of goal setting, we must learn to keep calm and carry on through those uncertain times.

Keep Calm and Carry On

According to Margaret Moore, the co-founder, and co-director of the Institute of Coaching at the McLean affiliated with Harvard Medical School, modern life has the ability to overload and exhaust the brain’s CEO region, the prefrontal cortex. This part of the brain plays a key role in planning, reasoning, and problem-solving, hence the difficulty many of us experience with goal setting. As such, Moore recommends taking control of our “emotional ships”, before we hit stormy weather in the murky waters of goal setting.

One of the first things Moore recommends you try to take control of your “emotional ship” is engaging in light exercise every few hours. Doing so can significantly assist in keeping calm while giving the prefrontal cortex a little energy boost. The reason this is effective is because directing attention to the heart and limbs give the brain a break to reframe and recharge. If, however, exercise is not an option for whatever reason, the next best thing is to get regular sleep, which includes strategically planned naps.

READ ALSO:  An Argument Against Setting New Year's Resolutions

Next, Moore suggests hitting the Pause and Reset button. Interestingly enough, the button is located it the middle of the forehead. Simply pressing on the forehead with your forefinger while taking deep breaths can help you shift your focus from your head to your breath, which is basically the essence of meditation. Saying the word “Pause” out loud can create an even more powerful cognitive break. To enhance the impact of this exercise, try pairing the activity with some calming aromatherapy blends for extra positive reinforcement.

Finally, Moore suggests experiencing our emotions in full as they come along. Surely you’ve had moments when you worked hard to suppress an overwhelmingly negative emotion that causes you true suffering. Instead of pushing it away, try to appreciate your own suffering while tuning into why you are feeling what you’re feeling. The science of self-compassion reveals that by embracing pain or disappointment, we can keep calm enough to push through the negativity.

The Elusive Art of Goal Setting

How to master the elusive art of goal setting

Now, let’s take a look at the actual steps you can take to master the elusive art of goal setting. Brian Tracy, the author of Flight Plan, gave readers an excellent overview of the process. In it, he explains how setting a goal is like flying a plane; most will reach their destination but will likely go off course due to turbulence, crosswinds, and other unforeseen circumstances. In other words, it’s OK to go encounter problems along the way, as long as you keep moving towards the destination.

Determine What You Want to Achieve

When engaging in goal setting, clearly define what you are trying to achieve. Consider tackling only one big goal at a time when starting out. This means thinking about what the goal entails, putting a timeframe on it, and accepting it as a conquerable challenge.

Step It Up

A big goal can be achieved by following small but concretely defined steps. This, by the way, is where most people encounter a problem. A realistic plan that breaks up the big goal into small and easily-to-follow phases can take a lot of anxiety and uncertainty out of goal setting. Since you can take small steps towards your goals on a daily basis, you are not only developing a healthy habit, you are also avoiding the frenzy of trying to do too much, which is why we often fall off the wagon.

READ ALSO:  What is an Affirmation and How Can I Use It?

Write It Down or Tell Somebody

This step is important for establishing accountability. Because for some, goal setting is synonymous with wishful thinking, it’s important to convince the brain that you’re serious about attaining the goals you set for yourself. By jotting them down or sharing them with others, you are actively committing to reaching them. Think of it as investing time and effort into fulfilling your dream, and because people hate losing out on their investments, this can be the needed push to keep going in the face of difficulty.

Don’t Give Up

OK, now that you’ve defined the goal, outlined the steps you need to take to attain it, and created a system of accountability – keep going and don’t give up. This is where people tend to fall behind. If you find yourself slipping, try using positive affirmations to keep yourself in line. Remind yourself of your goals, know that you are worthy of achieving what you want, and stick to your game plan. Goal setting is great; achieving what you want is better.

Baby step it

When it comes to goal setting, people tend to think they have to tirelessly work towards their goal every single day. That’s only half right. Doing something that brings you closer to your goal on a daily basis is key to success. However, giving yourself too much to do in a single day may kill your motivation to invest effort into achieving your goal the next day, or the one after that. Whether you can dedicate five minutes or two hours to an activity that brings you closer to the finish line, the investment needs to be consistent.

When it comes to goal setting, it’s important to keep calm and carry on – and Merkaela’s got just what you need to make it happen.

READ ALSO:  An Argument Against Setting New Year's Resolutions

 

How to Master the Elusive Art of Goal Setting

References

http://www.instituteofcoaching.org/users/margaret-moore
http://brain.oxfordjournals.org/content/122/5/994
https://www.amazon.com/Flight-Plan-Real-Secret-Success/dp/1605092754
http://blog.merkaela.com/subscription-box-elevate/

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    08/03/2016 at 2:42 pm

    […] Goal setting is immeasurably important when trying to stay positive, since much of our stress stems from a sense of helplessness in the face of bad news. When you have goals, you have to make plans for achieving them. This means working hard towards accomplishing something specific. Taking small steps on a daily basis will reinforce your sense of control over your life, even in the face of unforeseen obstacles. […]

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  2. Reprogram Your Subconscious Mind and Achieve Your Goals Today says:
    08/22/2016 at 9:39 am

    […] Are you ready to make your next big move or start your dream career? Do you have the desire to feel comfortable and confident in your body this summer but aren’t practicing the proper diet and workout that would make this possible? Are you ready to take your life to the next level but don’t know how? Do you have huge dreams but can’t shake the nagging feeling that you might be standing in your own way? Well, you’re not alone and you may need to reprogram your subconscious mind to achieve your goals. […]

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  3. 12 Ways to Become Mentally Strong and Change Your Life Forever! - Merkaela says:
    08/31/2016 at 7:55 pm

    […] Setting up goals is a part of human nature. However, we sometimes set up unrealistic goals because of either our excitement or overconfidence. When we fail to achieve these goals, we blame ourselves and acquire stress and anxiety because of this self-pity. […]

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  4. How to Maintain Sanity During the Holiday Season in 7 Easy Steps says:
    11/26/2016 at 9:41 pm

    […] and cooking are by far two of the most stressful aspects of the holiday season. To mange in due time without loosing your sanity, you have to figure out a simple but fairly specific plan. First, decide on your gift and meal […]

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    […] intend to practice self-care starting today, but don’t do so. To keep at it, take a close look at your calendar and rearrange it so that things like sleep, exercise, and relaxation will become a normal and scheduled part of your […]

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  6. How to Master the Elusive Art of Goal Setting – Merkaela – Site Title says:
    04/16/2017 at 8:01 pm

    […] “The art of goal setting is one of the most difficult skills for a lot of people to master. Unsurprisingly, simply setting goals is not the real problem, but finding the discipline and commitment to achieve them is; somehow, obstacles always seem to arise when trying to stay on track. And, once the goals are set, it can become increasingly difficult to cultivate the necessary patience and piece of mind to attain them.”http://blog.merkaela.com/master-elusive-art-goal-setting/ […]

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  7. How to Master the Elusive Art of Goal Setting – Merkaela – Site Title says:
    04/23/2020 at 9:09 pm

    […] https://blog.merkaela.com/master-elusive-art-goal-setting/ […]

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